01 January 2009

Two-thousand and Nine

this post is not finished yet.

My specific goals* and how I'm going to accomplish them:

  • Get back into a positive mindset. For far too long I've let too much negativity get to me and it's lead me to the places I'm at now. Not good. Wording has got to change- dreams = goals, etc. More smiling! I have to keep that PMA all the time. I have to be happy about everything all the time, no matter what.
  • Dedicate myself back to #1. The balance between my concern for myself and my concern for others is out of whack. As obvious as it should be, I have to look out for myself first and foremost because I haven't been doing that much at all in the past year. I've got to stop dreaming because it's time to wake up and face reality. I've been too comfortable for too long and that's fizzed me out. I'm boring and never excited and I don't want to be- it shows outwardly and it's not attractive. Once I do more for myself, my happiness will exude and it'll naturally help me help others.
  • Start learning again. I need to be a student once more. Whether it be getting trained again by Coach Dave @ CrossFit Seattle, attending school myself (!), or just reading again. I am going to read at least 20 pages a day five days a week. More if time permits and I'm sure it will.
  • Eat healthier using Paleo methods, then moving into the Zone diet towards the second half of the year. I will allow myself one cheat weekend (Friday, Saturday and Sunday) per month. Because I haven't really started weening myself towards this style of nutrition, I will have to slowly transition throughout January and the first half of February. I will be attempting to have three meals and two snacks a day. I'll also play around with Intermittent Fasting to see if that produces better results than that of the Zone. The basic premise is this: "Eat meat and vegetables, nuts and seeds, some fruit, little startch and no sugar."
  • Nearly-complete sobriety. I will allow myself one drink per cheat day. They can rollover (if I don't drink Friday and Sunday I can have three drinks on Saturday). Special occasions must be planned for, so no calling out. I do not give into peer-pressured drinking at all because I've done this before and can do so again.

  • I need to either go back to church or start meditation of some sort. Find something to strengthen my will because it's definitely weakened. Learning helps, as does music.
Until this past year, I haven't really realized the whole "so much change can happen within a year", but I can say that 2008 was my development year. I had a gist of who I really am, why I am, and what my virtues and beliefs are while being comfortable enough to share any of that with family, friends and complete strangers.

* I reserve the right to say one thing with complete conviction and say "Fuck it" and go back on my word the next. That's life. I DO understand the difference between people who do that often and people who do that because situations change. I am not going to be the former.

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